Two Tribes, One Camp, No Rules
The show opened with Jeff flying overhead in a white helicopter, below, in the back of a truck with a steer skull strapped to the front of it, are the contestants for the 24th edition of Survivor - One World.
-They are sizing each other up silently - we hear from the very preppy and, I'm just going to say it, SUPER gay guy who says this is his game - girls love him and the guys won't see him as a threat (all I'm seeing is show tunes and jazz hands - and yes, I'm going to hell for that one.)
-Hot Latina says if she finds out any of these dudes like her, they're going to get played - oh great, I have a feeling she's not going to make women look good.
-My guy is the sushi chef - unassuming looking guy says he's going to be underestimated because, "how bad-ass can a sushi chef be?" (I'm hoping very bad-ass, Jonas - very!)
-Pretty model boy has the weirdest voice - Whoa! Did he suck some helium somewhere? Shhshhh, don't ruin it. I totally missed what he said, something about aligning with the girls and boys...
Jeff says they all think they have the game figured out but what they don't know is that this time they will be divided into two tribes but all live together on one beach. Two tribes, one camp, no rules... then Jeff's hanging on the outside of the helicopter, "This is Survivor!" [and the helicopter banks away] - awesome.
Jeff lands, the crew piles out of the truck and he welcomes them to Survivor.
-Jeff asks the quirky girl with the whale toque - Kourtney (you're in Samoa, it's hot, you don't need a toque, hipster) where she fits in with the other women and she says nowhere - but she's going to make it a good thing. (Hot Latina has her game face ON. Oh yeah, she could care less about the girls, it's all about how she can manipulate the man meat.)
-Jeff then picks on Colton (preppy - jazz hands) and asks what he makes of the guys in the group - he simpers, "There's some good looking guys." (and no, I'm not exaggerating - I think he is though and I'm pretty sure it's part of his strategy. Let's see who I can make uncomfortable and keep off balance.)
-Jeff then asks Kenny Rogers (pre-plastic surgery) what his name is - "TarZan", Greg Tarzan but he's going to go by Tar-Zan... (Ugh, old guy, that is not making you come off cool.)
-Colton simpers (I have a feeling I'm going to be using that word a lot for him) "if he wants to swing and get me coconuts by all means."
-The other older guy is having none of the Greg Tarzan - he tells the camera, "He can't be Tarzan, I'm Troyzan and this is my island baby." (Whip 'em out boys, let's get it over with.)
Jeff then divides them into tribes - Men over here and Women over there... Colton is not happy, "Look at me, I'm the girl on the guy tribe."
-Jeff notices the women seem happier about the arrangement than the men - the black girl says, "of course, we all know men can't survive without women." (Amen!)
-Troyzan says the girls are all talk, the men will have no problems - with anything. (Wow, I think Troyzan has an attitude problem - he doesn't seem like he's going to play well with others.)
Men's tribe name is Manano and they're orange. The Women's tribe name is Salani and they're blue.
Then Jeff gives them 60 seconds to strip everything they can off the truck to take with them as supplies - and they start ripping everything off - gas cans, bamboo poles, bananas, baskets of reeds...some of them are working together - then the really tall dark haired guy starts just stealing all the stuff the girls have piled up and moving them over to the men's pile (what a gentleman - Oh, I just looked it up, he's a banker, greed is just his nature.)
-The woman didn't get any of the big stuff but they notice right away the axe is missing - yup, banker boy (Michael) stole it - and the men are called dirty cheaters. (Yup, making friends all over.)
-Jeff tells them there will be hidden immunity idols in play but there is no redemption island (thank goodness!) this season, if they are voted out, they are out.
-He gives both tribes maps to their camps - Michael/banker boy makes a snide remark about the women helping them read it - and Jeff sends them off in separate directions... little do they know they are heading to the same place.
Manono - Day 1 (Ha! There is Oh, No! in their name.)
-The men find it hard going - they have a long way to walk and they have tons of stuff to carry.
-Jonas (sushi chef) said he was sucking wind but trying not to show it - he was most impressed with Leif (little person) - he was carrying the heaviest stuff, he's a buff little dude.
Salani - Day 1
-The girls don't have nearly as much stuff but they find it hard going as well.
-Kourtney is not too happy about the men v/s women thing - she's a woman, she's knows we're all crazy (it's kinda true) - we can be all warm and accepting one minute and slitting your throat the next (well, that's extreme but I know what she's saying.)
-Alicia/hot Latina - says the hike into camp definitely showed her who were the stronger girls - Kim, Alicia, Chelsea, Sabrina & Kat - we have no idea who these girls are yet and I'm not going to describe them all but Alicia has decided this is her alliance of 5.
-These 5 girls are coming together on the hike in - Kim/Bridal shop owner - says she hadn't planned to form an alliance right off but when the men started stealing from them right off the truck that brought them together - Women Power - right off the bat.
The women are the first one's to reach the camp and they see both flags are planted there - so we all camp together... Shut... Up....(and the hits just keep on coming.) None of the women seem happy except Alicia, "It's gonna be a par-ty!" (That one's trouble.)
-The men show up not long after and Tarzan/Kenny Rogers doesn't look impressed. Jonas decides to keep the fishing gear close at hand so the women won't steal it (they're not you guys, sheesh.)
The women notice there are loose chickens roaming around and try to organize the next installment of my favourite Survivor staple: the epic battle of man/woman vs chicken. They decide to work together to try and catch the birds (Hahahaha... I love it ) - Chelsea is successful in catching two on her own - "Don't mess with the country girl."
-Tall blond boy says, "okay, give us ours" and she says, "hold on there" (ask for your axe back) the women are going to confer and figure out what they want in exchange for a chicken.
-I can understand the men being ticked by that because they did agree to work together, but they should be blaming banker boy because he started with the stealing and set the tone for inter-tribe relations.
-Tall blond boy is Matt, he's an attorney - he says he's not a ladies man, they give us that chicken as an apology (what?) and then we'll think about talking. (oh, I don't like him either.) The men figure the girls need them more than the men need the women - Matt says she'll come to her senses when she finishes being the hero and she'll come give us a chicken (yeah, hold your breath and wait for that to happen.)
Shelter building begins and everyone is working... except Colton. He sees the divide in this "one world" and he definitely wants to be with the women. Sabrina dubs him "Country Club Colton" and it's not going unnoticed by his tribe that he's over with the girls hugging and meeting them all.
-Attorney Matt says he has no problems with Colton being gay but he's not even trying to fit in with the 'manly' men of Manono. If he doesn't fix that he'll being going home quick. Matt tells him if he's siding with the women, he'll be going home but if he uses his access with the women to benefit the men he'll be fine.
-Colton tells the camera that Matt is very arrogant and condescending and if he, Colton, gets his way, Matt's torch will be going out quick.
-Attorney Matt, Banker Boy Michael, Model Jay and Comedian Bill all go by with no shirts on - Sabrina calls them the "Frat-boy alliance" and says she's blinded by the hotness.
-Matt lays it out to the camera - the way it always works is the strong stay and the weak go so he's aligned with the 'strong' guys and everyone else is screwed -(Oh my Godipus - the arrogance oozing through my TV screen was making me sick... come on Survivor Karma - do your worst!)
-A couple of the women (I don't know their names, the ladies in red) are trying to start a fire, rubbing sticks together and they have a pair of glasses - one of them is holding one of the chickens by it's legs and every once in a while it tries to escape but she's having none of it. Colton comes over and throws himself on their mercy, if they find a clue to a hidden idol, could they share it with him (wow, check out the balls on Colton - they may be powder puffs but they are hanging low - it's day one for goodness sakes and he's already begging for help.)
-Sabrina's (black high school teacher) not sure if Colton's charm is all an act but he's funny and she likes him.
-Back at Manono they men are also trying to get a fire going and then Jay speaks and I can't help it - what is up with his voice? - One world, two hemispheres - their tribe - our tribe (where is he hiding the helium tank?) They get the fire going and who wanders into camp - Sabrina, "Hey." The men are not welcoming. Sabrina floats the idea of swapping fire for a chicken and Matt's having none of that - they agreed to split the chickens no matter who caught them and he's not willing to deal with terrorists. (Is he not aware that Michael stole from the women? If it comes down to who started what -look no farther than your frat-boy buddy.)
-Of course then it degenerates, Alicia and Monica (older hot woman) come over and Monica says maybe if you gave us back the axe you stole you'd get a chicken - then Alicia tries to steal fire by holding some tinder in her hand (yeah, that would work lady) and the old guys and Alicia take it to stripper land - Ugh.
Salani - Night 1
-Now that it's dark, some of the young stupid girls decide to go ask if the men want to give them fire now... so they can see each other and talk. That's their big pitch, "Don't you want to give us fire now?" (Can you hear the sarcasm in my typing? Believe me, it's there.)
-It's Kim (bridal store owner) and Kat (what does ambiance mean?) - they run into banker boy Mike and he basically laughs at them - Fire's not going to happen. Then he scoffs at the thought that Tarzan may be running things - Kim proves she's not that stupid in that she figures Matt and possibly Mike are running things - but then she says that to him... sigh. Oh, here comes squeaker/Jay, he's making sure Mike isn't making any deals - it's war and if the girls are down, let them struggle.
-The older ladies, Monica & Christina, wait for everyone to fall asleep then sneak over to the men's side to try and steal an ember since they stole an axe. The men are passed out around the fire and the ladies use a long stick and take some fiery goodness right under their noses. (Oh man, this is going to get sooo ugly.)
Salani - Day 2
-The ladies did steal an ember but their fire died so they are back to square one. Christina (Asian woman) says she's not too proud to admit that they may need the men's help, they need fire to survive- so she goes over to broker a deal for fire. Christina talks to Jonas & Bill and they set a price of 20 woven frond mats for the men to give the girls fire. Alicia is not happy with Christina trying to make friends with the guys and she is trying to throw a wrench into the deal, we won't do it here, you take it there, you bring us this... (I can't stand this chick.) She thinks Christina needs to go.
Sabrina says she 'went to take a bath'(pretty sure that was a euphemism) and decided on the way back to take a look around for the idol - she jabs a stick into a hollow log and pulls out the idol - (Are you kidding me?) She's very excited until she reads the note with it that says it's a hidden idol for the Manono tribe and if you're not on Manono you have to give it up to someone on that tribe before the next tribal council (Nice! I like that twist - tribe specific immunity, I like it.) Sabrina doesn't like it so much - now who does she give it to? It's obvious - Colton. (I guess his constant early pleas actually worked out for him.)
IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
Oh, it's a complicated set up - looks like an obstacle course - One at a time they will jump from a 25ft tower onto a net - then cross a balance beam, cross a rope bridge and get to their mat - once every tribe member has made it to the mat they must raise their flag - first team to do that wins immunity... and fire in the form of flint (which the women still need.)
Off they go: and it's each stage they go one at a time then wait on a mat for everyone before they go on... hmmm. Jeff keeps telling them to drop on their back but apparently the women aren't listening, Kourtney lands on her wrist and hurts herself - The first guy, Bill, lost a shoe so everyone after him bounces with the shoe - it's pretty funny.
The guys finish the net drop one person up on the girls and move on to the balance beam - Kourtney is really favouring her arm and she sits down waiting for her turn - the guys are up 4 guys to the girls 2 when Jeff calls a halt to the proceedings to get medical in to look at Kourtney's wrist, it appears to be broken but they won't know for sure without X-rays.
SO - Jeff lays out their options - because the rules say 9 people start, 9 people must finish the challenge could be over right now and the men declared the winners sending the women to tribal council OR, the men can decide, as a gesture of goodwill to continue the challenge and let the chips fall where they may (crap, being a woman I wouldn't want the men to have anything else to be smug about.) The guys confer and even with Jeff's cautioning them about making early decisions that they won't be forgiven for - the men decide to take immunity and send the women to tribal council. And the women voice their disappointment and start goading them - be men, let's play on (really ladies?) Troyzan speaks for the guys and says he doesn't buy that the women would continue if the tables were turned, "We won, it's over."
Oh no boys, it's not over. The game is ON!
Salani - Day 3
-Nina, older/ex-cop short hair, got a fat lip at the challenge and was disappointed the guys didn't want to see it through. Matt tells her he felt like they were going to win anyway so why continue.(Really? Do you listen to the crap coming out of your mouth?) Nina, "Well, I guess we'll never know now." Kim(bridal shop owner) she's from Texas and is used to me being chivalrous, she can't believe how the men are playing so far.
-Sabrina is giving Colton advice (um, he's got immunity you gave him and you're the one going to tribal tonight) anyway - Colton sees the men being split 4 and 4 with him in the middle - she tells him to use his swing vote position to get rid of one of the big guys (Matt please!) She passes him the idol (Oh, I thought she'd already done that...okay, now it makes more sense) and tells him not to let Matt punk his *ss (I'm leaving that one alone.) They 'love ya, girlfriend' and he's audi.
Sabrina then joins the ladies and they discuss the elephant in the room - who to vote for - Kourtney's the obvious choice, especially if she's got a broken wrist, how can she compete?
Alicia feels bad for poor uncoordinated Kourtney but she's going to call Christina out for playing up to the men - she's poison and the rest need to know it. (Oh, not quite a cancer yet - that girl is poison.)
TRIBAL COUNCIL
Jeff says he'll update them on Kourtney in a minute but first - Alicia, what was it like when you walked onto your beach and realized you'd be living with the men?
-I actually like to bond with girls better (LIAR!) Christina rolls her eyes - I'm glad they moved out.
Kat, who's leading this tribe?
-We all have our individual jobs - like I handle the fire.
Christina, how'd you get fire?
-Well, I went over asked if there was anything we could do so they would help us with the fire because we need fire today.
Alicia jumps in - There was a shady deal that went down - she said two girls would weave for them in their camp (she did not)
Then there is lots of them talking over each other and Christina gets mad and tells her to SHUT UP! (Yes! I like her) - which then gets Alicia mumble threatening to punch her in her face... (oh for Christmas' sakes) Jeff tries to get it clarified more but Christina just says it worked, they got fire.
-All the women look upset with this dust up.
Chelsea, do you need to work together as a group of women before you go into the enemy camp or is everyone just doing their own thing?
-Eveyone's just doing their own thing. Even if we said we all needed to decide on everything, it still wouldn't happen. We're women, not everyone is going to agree, it's just part of it.
Monica, it appears there is no leader.
-Yeah, it's like we focus on the one thing right in front of us that needs to be done - it's anarchy.
Then Jeff plays daddy/host - you have no leader, open animosity between at least two tribe members and you're laughing about it but it's not funny when you have to come to Tribal Council- meanwhile the guys see you're all over the map and figure they've got you where they want you.
Now an update on Kourtney: Some good news and some bad news - she's doing fine but her wrist is broken in a couple of places and she is out of the game... that's the bad news. The good news, no one else is going home tonight (subtext - but now you all hate each other :) And they get to return to camp with fire.
He hopes they can turn things around or none of them will make it to the end.
Next time: the women go from bad to worse completely falling apart at the challenge and Colton is on the outs with everyone - the charm is gone, even Sabrina calls him a virus (not quite a cancer either, but he could get there.)
Kourtney’s final thoughts – she’s not very proud of herself, just a little adjustment with her hand and things would be different but she hopes her son thinks she was brave, even if it was only 3 days. (I’m almost sorry we didn’t get to see the rest of her tattoos.)
So, there you have it - a bunch of unlikeable pretty people starting out clawing and scratching from day one - I'm hopeful it gets better from here because there are already quite a few people I already actively dislike... and poor Kourtney, she may have been a hipster but she seemed sweet... probably better for her to go early. And with her going Hardeep/Michele, Krista H and Sunnie C all get their money back from the pool.
Have a great rest of the week everyone,
Coleen
The show opened with Jeff flying overhead in a white helicopter, below, in the back of a truck with a steer skull strapped to the front of it, are the contestants for the 24th edition of Survivor - One World.
-They are sizing each other up silently - we hear from the very preppy and, I'm just going to say it, SUPER gay guy who says this is his game - girls love him and the guys won't see him as a threat (all I'm seeing is show tunes and jazz hands - and yes, I'm going to hell for that one.)
-Hot Latina says if she finds out any of these dudes like her, they're going to get played - oh great, I have a feeling she's not going to make women look good.
-My guy is the sushi chef - unassuming looking guy says he's going to be underestimated because, "how bad-ass can a sushi chef be?" (I'm hoping very bad-ass, Jonas - very!)
-Pretty model boy has the weirdest voice - Whoa! Did he suck some helium somewhere? Shhshhh, don't ruin it. I totally missed what he said, something about aligning with the girls and boys...
Jeff says they all think they have the game figured out but what they don't know is that this time they will be divided into two tribes but all live together on one beach. Two tribes, one camp, no rules... then Jeff's hanging on the outside of the helicopter, "This is Survivor!" [and the helicopter banks away] - awesome.
Jeff lands, the crew piles out of the truck and he welcomes them to Survivor.
-Jeff asks the quirky girl with the whale toque - Kourtney (you're in Samoa, it's hot, you don't need a toque, hipster) where she fits in with the other women and she says nowhere - but she's going to make it a good thing. (Hot Latina has her game face ON. Oh yeah, she could care less about the girls, it's all about how she can manipulate the man meat.)
-Jeff then picks on Colton (preppy - jazz hands) and asks what he makes of the guys in the group - he simpers, "There's some good looking guys." (and no, I'm not exaggerating - I think he is though and I'm pretty sure it's part of his strategy. Let's see who I can make uncomfortable and keep off balance.)
-Jeff then asks Kenny Rogers (pre-plastic surgery) what his name is - "TarZan", Greg Tarzan but he's going to go by Tar-Zan... (Ugh, old guy, that is not making you come off cool.)
-Colton simpers (I have a feeling I'm going to be using that word a lot for him) "if he wants to swing and get me coconuts by all means."
-The other older guy is having none of the Greg Tarzan - he tells the camera, "He can't be Tarzan, I'm Troyzan and this is my island baby." (Whip 'em out boys, let's get it over with.)
Jeff then divides them into tribes - Men over here and Women over there... Colton is not happy, "Look at me, I'm the girl on the guy tribe."
-Jeff notices the women seem happier about the arrangement than the men - the black girl says, "of course, we all know men can't survive without women." (Amen!)
-Troyzan says the girls are all talk, the men will have no problems - with anything. (Wow, I think Troyzan has an attitude problem - he doesn't seem like he's going to play well with others.)
Men's tribe name is Manano and they're orange. The Women's tribe name is Salani and they're blue.
Then Jeff gives them 60 seconds to strip everything they can off the truck to take with them as supplies - and they start ripping everything off - gas cans, bamboo poles, bananas, baskets of reeds...some of them are working together - then the really tall dark haired guy starts just stealing all the stuff the girls have piled up and moving them over to the men's pile (what a gentleman - Oh, I just looked it up, he's a banker, greed is just his nature.)
-The woman didn't get any of the big stuff but they notice right away the axe is missing - yup, banker boy (Michael) stole it - and the men are called dirty cheaters. (Yup, making friends all over.)
-Jeff tells them there will be hidden immunity idols in play but there is no redemption island (thank goodness!) this season, if they are voted out, they are out.
-He gives both tribes maps to their camps - Michael/banker boy makes a snide remark about the women helping them read it - and Jeff sends them off in separate directions... little do they know they are heading to the same place.
Manono - Day 1 (Ha! There is Oh, No! in their name.)
-The men find it hard going - they have a long way to walk and they have tons of stuff to carry.
-Jonas (sushi chef) said he was sucking wind but trying not to show it - he was most impressed with Leif (little person) - he was carrying the heaviest stuff, he's a buff little dude.
Salani - Day 1
-The girls don't have nearly as much stuff but they find it hard going as well.
-Kourtney is not too happy about the men v/s women thing - she's a woman, she's knows we're all crazy (it's kinda true) - we can be all warm and accepting one minute and slitting your throat the next (well, that's extreme but I know what she's saying.)
-Alicia/hot Latina - says the hike into camp definitely showed her who were the stronger girls - Kim, Alicia, Chelsea, Sabrina & Kat - we have no idea who these girls are yet and I'm not going to describe them all but Alicia has decided this is her alliance of 5.
-These 5 girls are coming together on the hike in - Kim/Bridal shop owner - says she hadn't planned to form an alliance right off but when the men started stealing from them right off the truck that brought them together - Women Power - right off the bat.
The women are the first one's to reach the camp and they see both flags are planted there - so we all camp together... Shut... Up....(and the hits just keep on coming.) None of the women seem happy except Alicia, "It's gonna be a par-ty!" (That one's trouble.)
-The men show up not long after and Tarzan/Kenny Rogers doesn't look impressed. Jonas decides to keep the fishing gear close at hand so the women won't steal it (they're not you guys, sheesh.)
The women notice there are loose chickens roaming around and try to organize the next installment of my favourite Survivor staple: the epic battle of man/woman vs chicken. They decide to work together to try and catch the birds (Hahahaha... I love it ) - Chelsea is successful in catching two on her own - "Don't mess with the country girl."
-Tall blond boy says, "okay, give us ours" and she says, "hold on there" (ask for your axe back) the women are going to confer and figure out what they want in exchange for a chicken.
-I can understand the men being ticked by that because they did agree to work together, but they should be blaming banker boy because he started with the stealing and set the tone for inter-tribe relations.
-Tall blond boy is Matt, he's an attorney - he says he's not a ladies man, they give us that chicken as an apology (what?) and then we'll think about talking. (oh, I don't like him either.) The men figure the girls need them more than the men need the women - Matt says she'll come to her senses when she finishes being the hero and she'll come give us a chicken (yeah, hold your breath and wait for that to happen.)
Shelter building begins and everyone is working... except Colton. He sees the divide in this "one world" and he definitely wants to be with the women. Sabrina dubs him "Country Club Colton" and it's not going unnoticed by his tribe that he's over with the girls hugging and meeting them all.
-Attorney Matt says he has no problems with Colton being gay but he's not even trying to fit in with the 'manly' men of Manono. If he doesn't fix that he'll being going home quick. Matt tells him if he's siding with the women, he'll be going home but if he uses his access with the women to benefit the men he'll be fine.
-Colton tells the camera that Matt is very arrogant and condescending and if he, Colton, gets his way, Matt's torch will be going out quick.
-Attorney Matt, Banker Boy Michael, Model Jay and Comedian Bill all go by with no shirts on - Sabrina calls them the "Frat-boy alliance" and says she's blinded by the hotness.
-Matt lays it out to the camera - the way it always works is the strong stay and the weak go so he's aligned with the 'strong' guys and everyone else is screwed -(Oh my Godipus - the arrogance oozing through my TV screen was making me sick... come on Survivor Karma - do your worst!)
-A couple of the women (I don't know their names, the ladies in red) are trying to start a fire, rubbing sticks together and they have a pair of glasses - one of them is holding one of the chickens by it's legs and every once in a while it tries to escape but she's having none of it. Colton comes over and throws himself on their mercy, if they find a clue to a hidden idol, could they share it with him (wow, check out the balls on Colton - they may be powder puffs but they are hanging low - it's day one for goodness sakes and he's already begging for help.)
-Sabrina's (black high school teacher) not sure if Colton's charm is all an act but he's funny and she likes him.
-Back at Manono they men are also trying to get a fire going and then Jay speaks and I can't help it - what is up with his voice? - One world, two hemispheres - their tribe - our tribe (where is he hiding the helium tank?) They get the fire going and who wanders into camp - Sabrina, "Hey." The men are not welcoming. Sabrina floats the idea of swapping fire for a chicken and Matt's having none of that - they agreed to split the chickens no matter who caught them and he's not willing to deal with terrorists. (Is he not aware that Michael stole from the women? If it comes down to who started what -look no farther than your frat-boy buddy.)
-Of course then it degenerates, Alicia and Monica (older hot woman) come over and Monica says maybe if you gave us back the axe you stole you'd get a chicken - then Alicia tries to steal fire by holding some tinder in her hand (yeah, that would work lady) and the old guys and Alicia take it to stripper land - Ugh.
Salani - Night 1
-Now that it's dark, some of the young stupid girls decide to go ask if the men want to give them fire now... so they can see each other and talk. That's their big pitch, "Don't you want to give us fire now?" (Can you hear the sarcasm in my typing? Believe me, it's there.)
-It's Kim (bridal store owner) and Kat (what does ambiance mean?) - they run into banker boy Mike and he basically laughs at them - Fire's not going to happen. Then he scoffs at the thought that Tarzan may be running things - Kim proves she's not that stupid in that she figures Matt and possibly Mike are running things - but then she says that to him... sigh. Oh, here comes squeaker/Jay, he's making sure Mike isn't making any deals - it's war and if the girls are down, let them struggle.
-The older ladies, Monica & Christina, wait for everyone to fall asleep then sneak over to the men's side to try and steal an ember since they stole an axe. The men are passed out around the fire and the ladies use a long stick and take some fiery goodness right under their noses. (Oh man, this is going to get sooo ugly.)
Salani - Day 2
-The ladies did steal an ember but their fire died so they are back to square one. Christina (Asian woman) says she's not too proud to admit that they may need the men's help, they need fire to survive- so she goes over to broker a deal for fire. Christina talks to Jonas & Bill and they set a price of 20 woven frond mats for the men to give the girls fire. Alicia is not happy with Christina trying to make friends with the guys and she is trying to throw a wrench into the deal, we won't do it here, you take it there, you bring us this... (I can't stand this chick.) She thinks Christina needs to go.
Sabrina says she 'went to take a bath'(pretty sure that was a euphemism) and decided on the way back to take a look around for the idol - she jabs a stick into a hollow log and pulls out the idol - (Are you kidding me?) She's very excited until she reads the note with it that says it's a hidden idol for the Manono tribe and if you're not on Manono you have to give it up to someone on that tribe before the next tribal council (Nice! I like that twist - tribe specific immunity, I like it.) Sabrina doesn't like it so much - now who does she give it to? It's obvious - Colton. (I guess his constant early pleas actually worked out for him.)
IMMUNITY CHALLENGE
Oh, it's a complicated set up - looks like an obstacle course - One at a time they will jump from a 25ft tower onto a net - then cross a balance beam, cross a rope bridge and get to their mat - once every tribe member has made it to the mat they must raise their flag - first team to do that wins immunity... and fire in the form of flint (which the women still need.)
Off they go: and it's each stage they go one at a time then wait on a mat for everyone before they go on... hmmm. Jeff keeps telling them to drop on their back but apparently the women aren't listening, Kourtney lands on her wrist and hurts herself - The first guy, Bill, lost a shoe so everyone after him bounces with the shoe - it's pretty funny.
The guys finish the net drop one person up on the girls and move on to the balance beam - Kourtney is really favouring her arm and she sits down waiting for her turn - the guys are up 4 guys to the girls 2 when Jeff calls a halt to the proceedings to get medical in to look at Kourtney's wrist, it appears to be broken but they won't know for sure without X-rays.
SO - Jeff lays out their options - because the rules say 9 people start, 9 people must finish the challenge could be over right now and the men declared the winners sending the women to tribal council OR, the men can decide, as a gesture of goodwill to continue the challenge and let the chips fall where they may (crap, being a woman I wouldn't want the men to have anything else to be smug about.) The guys confer and even with Jeff's cautioning them about making early decisions that they won't be forgiven for - the men decide to take immunity and send the women to tribal council. And the women voice their disappointment and start goading them - be men, let's play on (really ladies?) Troyzan speaks for the guys and says he doesn't buy that the women would continue if the tables were turned, "We won, it's over."
Oh no boys, it's not over. The game is ON!
Salani - Day 3
-Nina, older/ex-cop short hair, got a fat lip at the challenge and was disappointed the guys didn't want to see it through. Matt tells her he felt like they were going to win anyway so why continue.(Really? Do you listen to the crap coming out of your mouth?) Nina, "Well, I guess we'll never know now." Kim(bridal shop owner) she's from Texas and is used to me being chivalrous, she can't believe how the men are playing so far.
-Sabrina is giving Colton advice (um, he's got immunity you gave him and you're the one going to tribal tonight) anyway - Colton sees the men being split 4 and 4 with him in the middle - she tells him to use his swing vote position to get rid of one of the big guys (Matt please!) She passes him the idol (Oh, I thought she'd already done that...okay, now it makes more sense) and tells him not to let Matt punk his *ss (I'm leaving that one alone.) They 'love ya, girlfriend' and he's audi.
Sabrina then joins the ladies and they discuss the elephant in the room - who to vote for - Kourtney's the obvious choice, especially if she's got a broken wrist, how can she compete?
Alicia feels bad for poor uncoordinated Kourtney but she's going to call Christina out for playing up to the men - she's poison and the rest need to know it. (Oh, not quite a cancer yet - that girl is poison.)
TRIBAL COUNCIL
Jeff says he'll update them on Kourtney in a minute but first - Alicia, what was it like when you walked onto your beach and realized you'd be living with the men?
-I actually like to bond with girls better (LIAR!) Christina rolls her eyes - I'm glad they moved out.
Kat, who's leading this tribe?
-We all have our individual jobs - like I handle the fire.
Christina, how'd you get fire?
-Well, I went over asked if there was anything we could do so they would help us with the fire because we need fire today.
Alicia jumps in - There was a shady deal that went down - she said two girls would weave for them in their camp (she did not)
Then there is lots of them talking over each other and Christina gets mad and tells her to SHUT UP! (Yes! I like her) - which then gets Alicia mumble threatening to punch her in her face... (oh for Christmas' sakes) Jeff tries to get it clarified more but Christina just says it worked, they got fire.
-All the women look upset with this dust up.
Chelsea, do you need to work together as a group of women before you go into the enemy camp or is everyone just doing their own thing?
-Eveyone's just doing their own thing. Even if we said we all needed to decide on everything, it still wouldn't happen. We're women, not everyone is going to agree, it's just part of it.
Monica, it appears there is no leader.
-Yeah, it's like we focus on the one thing right in front of us that needs to be done - it's anarchy.
Then Jeff plays daddy/host - you have no leader, open animosity between at least two tribe members and you're laughing about it but it's not funny when you have to come to Tribal Council- meanwhile the guys see you're all over the map and figure they've got you where they want you.
Now an update on Kourtney: Some good news and some bad news - she's doing fine but her wrist is broken in a couple of places and she is out of the game... that's the bad news. The good news, no one else is going home tonight (subtext - but now you all hate each other :) And they get to return to camp with fire.
He hopes they can turn things around or none of them will make it to the end.
Next time: the women go from bad to worse completely falling apart at the challenge and Colton is on the outs with everyone - the charm is gone, even Sabrina calls him a virus (not quite a cancer either, but he could get there.)
Kourtney’s final thoughts – she’s not very proud of herself, just a little adjustment with her hand and things would be different but she hopes her son thinks she was brave, even if it was only 3 days. (I’m almost sorry we didn’t get to see the rest of her tattoos.)
So, there you have it - a bunch of unlikeable pretty people starting out clawing and scratching from day one - I'm hopeful it gets better from here because there are already quite a few people I already actively dislike... and poor Kourtney, she may have been a hipster but she seemed sweet... probably better for her to go early. And with her going Hardeep/Michele, Krista H and Sunnie C all get their money back from the pool.
Have a great rest of the week everyone,
Coleen
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