Can I Get a Hot Tub
Last week was the two hour Africa extravaganza that took out my Olympians... enough said.
We opened right after the Pit Stop when the teams find out they are tenting again - and Hayley whines at Blair to set up her tent for her... and then they gave us a montage of her annoying non-stop nagging.
-They even showed all the teams eating together in camp and Matt offhandedly saying to Jenny & Jelani that their U-Turning them was just part of the game... the lawyers have their poker faces on, "of course." But they tell the camera if you're going to U-Turn a team, you better make sure they go home." Jenny says they [Matt & Ashley] used their one U-Turn and it didn't make any difference, we're still here. (Hmm, I beg to differ there, you had to use your Express Pass so it wasn't all for not.) Matt says he knows they'll get him back if they have the chance and they all laugh (cause it's so true.)
- Laura & Tyler are the first out the next day, reading the clue that they are heading to Amsterdam! Once they touch down they must make their way to Jagershuis and look for their next clue (in a bicycle shaped like a wooden shoe!) They can't believe they're going all the way back to Europe (I bet everyone's on the same flight.) And they said they enjoyed teaming up with Matt & Ashley the last two legs but they are a very physical team and they kind of go nuts so the calmer and cooler Laura & Tyler think they can use that to their advantage.
-Matt & Ashley - he is growing a play-off Race beard - he's going to let it grow until he wins the million... and the beard is craving the cool breezes of Amsterdam.
-Blair is bugging Hayley that they are heading back to the airport where she fell in love with the hunky pilot... they seem to have fallen into a sibling kind of ribbing which is kind of sweet (oh, what's wrong with me.)
-They don't show Jelani & Jenny or Mike & Rochelle heading to the airport but they are all there - boarding the plane.
Amsterdam, Netherlands
-They are all in cabs heading to their next destination and speculating on what they'll be doing - Tyler is 0 for 100 predictions but he's saying they're going to be in boats as soon as they get there... we shall see.
Jagershuis - Jenny & Jelani are the first to arrive followed right behind by Tyler & Laura - they get the clue for the ROADBLOCK: Who's got a nice set of klompen?
-Klompen are the iconic yellow wooden shoes of the Dutch. In this task they will have to search through hundreds of klompen in the cobbler shop to find one that is decorated identically to their sample. Once they have the matching pair, they'll get their next clue.
-Jenny is doing this one, "Oh, and we got date night." (That'll be a waste, these two are not a love match.)
-Tyler decides he's going to do this one even though he has no idea what klompen are.
And when they get inside we find out they have to change into the provided costume! (Yay! You know I love it when they have to dress up.) Apparently I'm not the only one, Tyler also likes to dress up - he lists the costumes he's had to don - Leiderhosen, Lady boy and Prince in Monaco - see, it's fun.
-More teams show up and Matt and Rochelle are also going to be looking for the matching klompen.
-They were not allowed to make any notes, they could only look at the shoe and then go in the other room FULL of the yellow shoes... and they are all decorated similarly (oof.)
-Jenny proves to have the eye for detail and they are the first to get the next clue, to ride bikes along the Amstel river to the Munttoren.
Of course once on the bikes Jenny is her fake self acting like she's on a travel show, "This is the perfect way to be introduced to Amsterdam." (Ugh, I really don't like her.)
(Oh, and I just had a thought, what if someone doesn't know how to ride a bike?)
-Back in the shop, Blair has joined the costumed klompen searchers... Matt is denied... Tyler is the next person to find the right match and they head out for a lovely bike ride.
-Inside, Blair is trying to screw with the others, asking Rochelle if she's using the heel heights or what... "There are different heights?" (NO, but he has Matt looking at the heels too - what a rotter.)
-We cut to the bike riders having a great time, look a windmill - and they have to take a ferry across the river - so Tyler's boat prediction kind of came true.
-In the cobbler hut, Hayley really thinks she's shouting encouragement when she's shrilly telling Blair to hurry up, we've got to catch up... he tells us sarcastically later, "yeah, it was really sweet."
-Blair is the next to get the right match and they head out for a lovely bike ride. He's pointing out the awesome windmill, Hayley,"Oh my god the smell - it smells like poop." Blair, "It's an amazing day out." Hayley, "It's so cold." (Holy Debbie Downer! I bet he wants to push her in the river.)
-Matt is way too A.D.D. for the detail oriented work of finding that shoe - he keeps trying and he keeps getting it wrong. Ashley is thinking she should have done this one.
-Rochelle, meanwhile, is taking a slow and steady approach... and she gets the right shoe. They take off to ride bikes.
-Ashley is trying to tell Matt to just take a minute, take a breath, but he's manic... and he picks up the right shoe - AND PUTS IT BACK DOWN! Oh no, all is lost.
-The bike riding pairs are taking the ferry one at a time so they are pretty evenly staggered as they have to wait for the ferry between crossings. But once on the other side of the river Jenny & Jelani asked a woman for directions who may have sent them the wrong way. Tyler & Laura seem to have made it to civilization quicker.
-Blair & Hayley getting off the ferry see that Matt & Rochelle are right behind them so Hayley says they really have to book it out of there - and then proceeds to slowly ride her bike and whine at Blair to wait for her because she's so cold (ugh, do you even listen to yourself? How is that booking it out of there?)
-Meanwhile, Matt's in a panic and it's just getting worse in the klompen search.
-Laura & Tyler are the first team to find the next clue box, and get the clue to the DETOUR: Soak or Shuffle
-In Soak, they must drive an electric powered hot tub through the waterways spotting a series of symbols along the way - once they solve the rhebus (symbol puzzle) they'll get their next clue.
-In Shuffle, they must go back in time and play a dutch version of shuffle board called Sjoelen - if they can score 51 points with their pucks, they'll score their next clue (oh, do they have to dress up for that too? All the extras are in 15th century garb.)
-Laura & Tyler decide to do Soak (I don't blame them, hot tub!)
-Back on the bikes it's the familiar refrain of Hayley, "Blair, you have to wait for me. Blair! Blair! (you'll have to imagine the whine.) So he finally gives in to her and slows down to ride side by side with her "like a teammate" and the next words out of her mouth, "Hurry, Blair, Mike & Rochelle are right behind us." (OMG! I can't, I just... argh!)
-Matt still can't find the shoe and Ashley is telling him not to give up, just bring every single shoe out...
-Jenny & Jelani finally get to the clue box (they wen't some crazy route, don't always listen to the locals) and they are also going to be Soaking.
-Laura & Tyler get to the hot tubs and they have to change - she into a bathing suit and he's going in his underwear (black boxer briefs). This really looks too cool - they're in a hot tub, floating down the river... and Tyler's having too much fun flexing for the ladies along the side to be looking for symbols (I hope they haven't missed any.)
-Blair & Hayley get to the Detour clue and also choose Soak. Blair takes the time to ask someone for directions and she's just shrieking at him that they don't have time for this (You don't have time to find out where you're going?... I am actively starting to hate her.) They take off and see Mike & Rochelle - Blair high fives Mike and tells them they're on the right track - Hayley just keeps shrieking for him to pay attention to what they're doing.
-Mike & Rochelle are the only team so far choosing shuffle and being a person of size myself, I get it - I'm not wearing a bathing suit on TV if I don't have to... though I still think I'd rather do the hot tub boats (They look so cool.)
-Back at the shoe shop... Matt is so disheartened he's finally calmed down and when he goes to look at the shoe he's trying to match, he finally sees the subtle differences... Sheesh. He finally gets the right shoe on his 43rd attempt! Hallelujah! Time for a bike ride.
-Laura & Tyler start finding the symbols:
II
III (? not sure what the I's mean)
(Skis - is) + (square root of 64) + (ring - r) = skating
R + Splat(ink) = rink
-Jenny & Jelani see Tyler & Laura in the boat and can't figure out how they got there so fast - they head in to change.
-Blair & Hayley are lost as usual and of course it's all his fault according to her who doesn't listen or shut up long enough for him to listen... They turn around and he's to the point that he just laughs at her ridiculousness now. (Whatever you need to do to cope - he's going to have PTSD after this experience.) She just doesn't stop, I can't even write it down, her constant barrage of negativity just makes me want to start rocking in a corner.
-Mike & Rochelle get to the shuffle board place and the old guys sit up, excited someone showed up I think. This sjoelen game is sliding pucks along a shuffleboard which ends in four slots, 1, 2, 3, 4 - if they get a puck in each slot that's 20 points - they have to make it to 51 (ho boy, this could take a while).
-Rochelle goes first and she gets them 34 points (way to go), Mike's not so good at it but they had quite the cheering section, the guys watching were great.
-Matt & Ashley are riding to the ferry and he's just apologizing - she says it's okay we'll just have to try and catch up.
-Laura and Tyler are still trying to work out the symbols: I's lots of I's... I's - Ice, Tyler figures it out : Ice Skating Rink! He's a smarty. And they high five that the Olympians are gone if they have to go ice skating.
-Jenny & Jelani get in the hot tub and she keeps the robe on (seriously? I know it's cold outside but now you're in a sodden terry cloth robe, it's not going to keep you warmer.) Let's see if the lawyers are as good at deciphering the symbols.
-Tyler & Laura get the correct answer to the puzzle, and the clue to the PIT STOP: Museumplein Ice Skating Rink.
-Mike & Rochelle get 50 points with their last puck! Oh, so close. They have to try again (So it seems they both get to go and their total has to get to 51 points to get through - it resets when the first person goes again.)
-Matt & Ashley have just made it to the ferry (wow, they are soooo far behind.)
-Jenny & Jelani are figuring out the puzzle the same as Tyler & Laura... got the skating rink but what are the 5 I's?
-Blair & Hayley are finally at the hot tubs and she doesn't have a bathing suit, she's in a shirt and bathing suit and complaining about it of course. They are gathering the clues - no one gets the I's.
-Jenny & Jelani get back to the dock and still don't know the first word, she thinks they should go again so they head back out to ask Hayley & Blair what they think it is.
-Hayley figures out it's Ice Skating Rink - so she can lord it over Blair some more that she's always right.
-Mike & Rochelle are enjoying the shuffle board, they're getting the hang of it - but still haven't reached the magic number.
-Blair & Hayley play dumb when Jenny & Jelani ask them what the 5 I's are - they say they don't know... (that's right, no help for you!) They get the clue to the Pit Stop.
-Jelani suggests maybe it's Roman Skating Rink because of the Roman numerals and Jenny's on board (think about it people!)
-Matt & Ashley finally get to the Detour clue and choose Shuffle... hmmm, I don't think that's going to bring them back.
-Mike & Rochelle have finally hit the magic number and they get the clue to the Pit Stop.
-Matt & Ashley show up at the shuffle board place and Matt's a shark! He made 42 points all on his own... She only needed 9 points and with Matt's coaching she gets 6...
-Jenny & Jelani have finally gotten out of the hot tub but they don't know the answer - they start just putting down Skating Rink, then 5 I's skating rink... they are so over-thinking this.
-She wants to ask somebody on the street for the name of a skating rink around there... and the guy says, "An Ice Skating Rink?" Ice, Oh, Ice! And they get the clue to the Pit Stop.
-Mike & Rochelle are pedaling blindly looking for Phil, they stop to ask someone for directions and find out they were heading in the wrong direction (Oh man!)
-Matt & Ashley finally make it to 51 points and get a rousing cheer from the crowd (oh, I love those 15th century shuffle enthusiasts!)
They head for the Pit Stop, knowing what's coming... but they've had the greatest time and will have stories to share with their kids, when they have them.
Here's How They Finished:
1) Tyler & Laura - 2nd first place in a row. They won a trip to Seoul, S. Korea.
2) Blair & Hayley - excited to be in 2nd place they do an awkward high-five hug thing... (they're getting it done even if she is the most annoying human on the planet.)
3) Jenny & Jelani - Phil points out that the first three teams to check in were all blind dating couples - how amazing is that?
4) Mike & Rochelle - They've been in the bottom since the beginning but they are going to keep fighting, "Everybody loves an underdog story."
5) Matt & Ashley - NON-ELIMINATION leg and they are not going home yet. Ashley, "We're not having babies yet!"
Next episode: They head to Peru where they go to work at the Roadblock (looks like cutting down sugar cane with a machete) and come crashing down at the Detour (potatoes all over the ground.) We're in store for more complaining and frustration, fun!
Have a great week everybody,
Coleen
Last week was the two hour Africa extravaganza that took out my Olympians... enough said.
We opened right after the Pit Stop when the teams find out they are tenting again - and Hayley whines at Blair to set up her tent for her... and then they gave us a montage of her annoying non-stop nagging.
-They even showed all the teams eating together in camp and Matt offhandedly saying to Jenny & Jelani that their U-Turning them was just part of the game... the lawyers have their poker faces on, "of course." But they tell the camera if you're going to U-Turn a team, you better make sure they go home." Jenny says they [Matt & Ashley] used their one U-Turn and it didn't make any difference, we're still here. (Hmm, I beg to differ there, you had to use your Express Pass so it wasn't all for not.) Matt says he knows they'll get him back if they have the chance and they all laugh (cause it's so true.)
- Laura & Tyler are the first out the next day, reading the clue that they are heading to Amsterdam! Once they touch down they must make their way to Jagershuis and look for their next clue (in a bicycle shaped like a wooden shoe!) They can't believe they're going all the way back to Europe (I bet everyone's on the same flight.) And they said they enjoyed teaming up with Matt & Ashley the last two legs but they are a very physical team and they kind of go nuts so the calmer and cooler Laura & Tyler think they can use that to their advantage.
-Matt & Ashley - he is growing a play-off Race beard - he's going to let it grow until he wins the million... and the beard is craving the cool breezes of Amsterdam.
-Blair is bugging Hayley that they are heading back to the airport where she fell in love with the hunky pilot... they seem to have fallen into a sibling kind of ribbing which is kind of sweet (oh, what's wrong with me.)
-They don't show Jelani & Jenny or Mike & Rochelle heading to the airport but they are all there - boarding the plane.
Amsterdam, Netherlands
-They are all in cabs heading to their next destination and speculating on what they'll be doing - Tyler is 0 for 100 predictions but he's saying they're going to be in boats as soon as they get there... we shall see.
Jagershuis - Jenny & Jelani are the first to arrive followed right behind by Tyler & Laura - they get the clue for the ROADBLOCK: Who's got a nice set of klompen?
-Klompen are the iconic yellow wooden shoes of the Dutch. In this task they will have to search through hundreds of klompen in the cobbler shop to find one that is decorated identically to their sample. Once they have the matching pair, they'll get their next clue.
-Jenny is doing this one, "Oh, and we got date night." (That'll be a waste, these two are not a love match.)
-Tyler decides he's going to do this one even though he has no idea what klompen are.
And when they get inside we find out they have to change into the provided costume! (Yay! You know I love it when they have to dress up.) Apparently I'm not the only one, Tyler also likes to dress up - he lists the costumes he's had to don - Leiderhosen, Lady boy and Prince in Monaco - see, it's fun.
-More teams show up and Matt and Rochelle are also going to be looking for the matching klompen.
-They were not allowed to make any notes, they could only look at the shoe and then go in the other room FULL of the yellow shoes... and they are all decorated similarly (oof.)
-Jenny proves to have the eye for detail and they are the first to get the next clue, to ride bikes along the Amstel river to the Munttoren.
Of course once on the bikes Jenny is her fake self acting like she's on a travel show, "This is the perfect way to be introduced to Amsterdam." (Ugh, I really don't like her.)
(Oh, and I just had a thought, what if someone doesn't know how to ride a bike?)
-Back in the shop, Blair has joined the costumed klompen searchers... Matt is denied... Tyler is the next person to find the right match and they head out for a lovely bike ride.
-Inside, Blair is trying to screw with the others, asking Rochelle if she's using the heel heights or what... "There are different heights?" (NO, but he has Matt looking at the heels too - what a rotter.)
-We cut to the bike riders having a great time, look a windmill - and they have to take a ferry across the river - so Tyler's boat prediction kind of came true.
-In the cobbler hut, Hayley really thinks she's shouting encouragement when she's shrilly telling Blair to hurry up, we've got to catch up... he tells us sarcastically later, "yeah, it was really sweet."
-Blair is the next to get the right match and they head out for a lovely bike ride. He's pointing out the awesome windmill, Hayley,"Oh my god the smell - it smells like poop." Blair, "It's an amazing day out." Hayley, "It's so cold." (Holy Debbie Downer! I bet he wants to push her in the river.)
-Matt is way too A.D.D. for the detail oriented work of finding that shoe - he keeps trying and he keeps getting it wrong. Ashley is thinking she should have done this one.
-Rochelle, meanwhile, is taking a slow and steady approach... and she gets the right shoe. They take off to ride bikes.
-Ashley is trying to tell Matt to just take a minute, take a breath, but he's manic... and he picks up the right shoe - AND PUTS IT BACK DOWN! Oh no, all is lost.
-The bike riding pairs are taking the ferry one at a time so they are pretty evenly staggered as they have to wait for the ferry between crossings. But once on the other side of the river Jenny & Jelani asked a woman for directions who may have sent them the wrong way. Tyler & Laura seem to have made it to civilization quicker.
-Blair & Hayley getting off the ferry see that Matt & Rochelle are right behind them so Hayley says they really have to book it out of there - and then proceeds to slowly ride her bike and whine at Blair to wait for her because she's so cold (ugh, do you even listen to yourself? How is that booking it out of there?)
-Meanwhile, Matt's in a panic and it's just getting worse in the klompen search.
-Laura & Tyler are the first team to find the next clue box, and get the clue to the DETOUR: Soak or Shuffle
-In Soak, they must drive an electric powered hot tub through the waterways spotting a series of symbols along the way - once they solve the rhebus (symbol puzzle) they'll get their next clue.
-In Shuffle, they must go back in time and play a dutch version of shuffle board called Sjoelen - if they can score 51 points with their pucks, they'll score their next clue (oh, do they have to dress up for that too? All the extras are in 15th century garb.)
-Laura & Tyler decide to do Soak (I don't blame them, hot tub!)
-Back on the bikes it's the familiar refrain of Hayley, "Blair, you have to wait for me. Blair! Blair! (you'll have to imagine the whine.) So he finally gives in to her and slows down to ride side by side with her "like a teammate" and the next words out of her mouth, "Hurry, Blair, Mike & Rochelle are right behind us." (OMG! I can't, I just... argh!)
-Matt still can't find the shoe and Ashley is telling him not to give up, just bring every single shoe out...
-Jenny & Jelani finally get to the clue box (they wen't some crazy route, don't always listen to the locals) and they are also going to be Soaking.
-Laura & Tyler get to the hot tubs and they have to change - she into a bathing suit and he's going in his underwear (black boxer briefs). This really looks too cool - they're in a hot tub, floating down the river... and Tyler's having too much fun flexing for the ladies along the side to be looking for symbols (I hope they haven't missed any.)
-Blair & Hayley get to the Detour clue and also choose Soak. Blair takes the time to ask someone for directions and she's just shrieking at him that they don't have time for this (You don't have time to find out where you're going?... I am actively starting to hate her.) They take off and see Mike & Rochelle - Blair high fives Mike and tells them they're on the right track - Hayley just keeps shrieking for him to pay attention to what they're doing.
-Mike & Rochelle are the only team so far choosing shuffle and being a person of size myself, I get it - I'm not wearing a bathing suit on TV if I don't have to... though I still think I'd rather do the hot tub boats (They look so cool.)
-Back at the shoe shop... Matt is so disheartened he's finally calmed down and when he goes to look at the shoe he's trying to match, he finally sees the subtle differences... Sheesh. He finally gets the right shoe on his 43rd attempt! Hallelujah! Time for a bike ride.
-Laura & Tyler start finding the symbols:
II
III (? not sure what the I's mean)
(Skis - is) + (square root of 64) + (ring - r) = skating
R + Splat(ink) = rink
-Jenny & Jelani see Tyler & Laura in the boat and can't figure out how they got there so fast - they head in to change.
-Blair & Hayley are lost as usual and of course it's all his fault according to her who doesn't listen or shut up long enough for him to listen... They turn around and he's to the point that he just laughs at her ridiculousness now. (Whatever you need to do to cope - he's going to have PTSD after this experience.) She just doesn't stop, I can't even write it down, her constant barrage of negativity just makes me want to start rocking in a corner.
-Mike & Rochelle get to the shuffle board place and the old guys sit up, excited someone showed up I think. This sjoelen game is sliding pucks along a shuffleboard which ends in four slots, 1, 2, 3, 4 - if they get a puck in each slot that's 20 points - they have to make it to 51 (ho boy, this could take a while).
-Rochelle goes first and she gets them 34 points (way to go), Mike's not so good at it but they had quite the cheering section, the guys watching were great.
-Matt & Ashley are riding to the ferry and he's just apologizing - she says it's okay we'll just have to try and catch up.
-Laura and Tyler are still trying to work out the symbols: I's lots of I's... I's - Ice, Tyler figures it out : Ice Skating Rink! He's a smarty. And they high five that the Olympians are gone if they have to go ice skating.
-Jenny & Jelani get in the hot tub and she keeps the robe on (seriously? I know it's cold outside but now you're in a sodden terry cloth robe, it's not going to keep you warmer.) Let's see if the lawyers are as good at deciphering the symbols.
-Tyler & Laura get the correct answer to the puzzle, and the clue to the PIT STOP: Museumplein Ice Skating Rink.
-Mike & Rochelle get 50 points with their last puck! Oh, so close. They have to try again (So it seems they both get to go and their total has to get to 51 points to get through - it resets when the first person goes again.)
-Matt & Ashley have just made it to the ferry (wow, they are soooo far behind.)
-Jenny & Jelani are figuring out the puzzle the same as Tyler & Laura... got the skating rink but what are the 5 I's?
-Blair & Hayley are finally at the hot tubs and she doesn't have a bathing suit, she's in a shirt and bathing suit and complaining about it of course. They are gathering the clues - no one gets the I's.
-Jenny & Jelani get back to the dock and still don't know the first word, she thinks they should go again so they head back out to ask Hayley & Blair what they think it is.
-Hayley figures out it's Ice Skating Rink - so she can lord it over Blair some more that she's always right.
-Mike & Rochelle are enjoying the shuffle board, they're getting the hang of it - but still haven't reached the magic number.
-Blair & Hayley play dumb when Jenny & Jelani ask them what the 5 I's are - they say they don't know... (that's right, no help for you!) They get the clue to the Pit Stop.
-Jelani suggests maybe it's Roman Skating Rink because of the Roman numerals and Jenny's on board (think about it people!)
-Matt & Ashley finally get to the Detour clue and choose Shuffle... hmmm, I don't think that's going to bring them back.
-Mike & Rochelle have finally hit the magic number and they get the clue to the Pit Stop.
-Matt & Ashley show up at the shuffle board place and Matt's a shark! He made 42 points all on his own... She only needed 9 points and with Matt's coaching she gets 6...
-Jenny & Jelani have finally gotten out of the hot tub but they don't know the answer - they start just putting down Skating Rink, then 5 I's skating rink... they are so over-thinking this.
-She wants to ask somebody on the street for the name of a skating rink around there... and the guy says, "An Ice Skating Rink?" Ice, Oh, Ice! And they get the clue to the Pit Stop.
-Mike & Rochelle are pedaling blindly looking for Phil, they stop to ask someone for directions and find out they were heading in the wrong direction (Oh man!)
-Matt & Ashley finally make it to 51 points and get a rousing cheer from the crowd (oh, I love those 15th century shuffle enthusiasts!)
They head for the Pit Stop, knowing what's coming... but they've had the greatest time and will have stories to share with their kids, when they have them.
Here's How They Finished:
1) Tyler & Laura - 2nd first place in a row. They won a trip to Seoul, S. Korea.
2) Blair & Hayley - excited to be in 2nd place they do an awkward high-five hug thing... (they're getting it done even if she is the most annoying human on the planet.)
3) Jenny & Jelani - Phil points out that the first three teams to check in were all blind dating couples - how amazing is that?
4) Mike & Rochelle - They've been in the bottom since the beginning but they are going to keep fighting, "Everybody loves an underdog story."
5) Matt & Ashley - NON-ELIMINATION leg and they are not going home yet. Ashley, "We're not having babies yet!"
Next episode: They head to Peru where they go to work at the Roadblock (looks like cutting down sugar cane with a machete) and come crashing down at the Detour (potatoes all over the ground.) We're in store for more complaining and frustration, fun!
Have a great week everybody,
Coleen
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